The Boob Job by Bruce Loper

Author:Bruce Loper
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Detective, Humor, Action & Adventure, Humorous, Fiction, erotic, General Humor, Adventure, Comedy, Humor & Satire, Literature & Fiction
Publisher: Kindred Digital Publishing
Published: 2013-03-05T06:00:00+00:00

16

They were getting ready to go to Jimmy's mom's insurance company, since they had decided it was safest to stick together in case Reverend George showed up, when Dirk remembered one more thing. “Oh yeah, he said. This is funny, Jen. Detective Palmatier told Kevin and me that everyone here thinks ya killed yer aunt. He said when you were findin' phone numbers, the receptionist called the police saying she knew where the murderer was. She wanted a reward.”

“How is that funny?” Jimmy asked as Jen turned kind of green and bit down on her finger.

“Well, she's gotta be stupid. I mean, who would kill their aunt and then stay the night in the same place? I mean, a killer would leave town. I thought it was funny, stupid funny.”

“Ya mean, get out of town kinda like it looks like we're doing right now?”

They headed to lunch and Dirk actually wanted to go the Pirate's Cove so he could get the biggest sack of fries they had. He said no place ever gives ya enough fries, so he would just pick out the sack and tell the person working the counter to just keep putting in bags of fries until the sack was full. He figured he'd need another sack in order to get enough little tubes of ketchup. Jimmy and Jen out-voted him and chose Kon Tiki. Dirk made it a rule that from now on, they only get one vote, and he sulked, entering the restaurant.

There he made a point of ordering the most expensive stuff on the menu, which turned out to be the Lunch Lobster and Lobster Bisque Soup. He picked at each one and kept reaching for the fries that came with Jimmy's Kon Tiki Burger. He wanted to know if Jen ever had fries dipped in ranch dressing. She ordered him a side of fries, and they each had an umbrella drink, which they agreed to limit to one since they had to see Jimmy's mom. They ate Black Magic Cake for dessert. Jen said chocolate was her weakness, but Jimmy thought it might be food in general as she ate as much as he did and not any of that girlie salad. He was relieved.

When the bill came, it was over one-hundred dollars, way over a hundred, and Jimmy suggested this place really rips off the tourists. They thought they'd throw in a twenty-percent tip since Dirk said the waitress was cute, and Jen looked at the pile of dishes and said she earned it. Jimmy signed the receipt with their room number and held his breath. They couldn't cover the bill if Sperling didn't do his job, but the cashier said thank you and they left. Dirk said by the time the two weeks were up, they were going to wish they had given them the hundred-thou and once outside, high-fived Jimmy.

Jimmy and Jen stopped by her old room to see if she could get keys and more clothes, but the tape was still crossing the door.

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